Friday, December 28, 2018


Ok , I am going to talk about basics of advocacy here .

I am fed up and because I am fed up I do not care if I loose friends over this !

I have been doing advocacy for almost 10 years .

And I have attended / Been part of advocacy groups also for almost 10 years .

I have noticed that a lot of advocates confuse conferences or advocacy meetings with therapy sessions . Call me an asshole , But this has been my observation throughout The years .

Now let's go to basics ; Being an advocate means literally doing advocacy with or without background of a degree in Law . You MUST have a thick skin , Have a sense of humor and accept losses .

When I say "Accept losses " I mean you have to accept that a Legislator, Senator does not want to talk to you and or simply does not care about your issue . You have to accept that a State Representative does not care about your issue , Does not like you for whatever reason  and or insults you .

Your personal feelings are here COMPLETELY irrelevant !  What matters though is that you are fighting for what is RIGHT .

I can assure you that every Lobbyiest , Senator , Governor and even every President of our country has been in some  way insulted or humiliated whether openly or in private . That is simply part of politics .

Never mind gossip whether true or false that happens in prominent law offices . And rest assured that Judges get bullied as well .

I am not referring here to any particular President or other Government official or lawmaker .

This has been happening for decades !

And honestly it does not matter what you are advocating about . You will always find a State Rep. Who cares as much about your issues as about Black Friday . And if this does not make sense then here is another one ; Some State officials care more about restaurants that serve The BEST pasta in town than about actual human life .

So your job is to convince these people that pasta is made by humans ! And without humans there would not be a good cook to make great pasta !  I am intentionally using strange humor here because you HAVE to be able to connect with politicians to convince them WHY your cause is so important !

If this is not something you can do then that is OK . You are maybe better at getting their attention by protesting to get your message across and that will work as well !

If you feel insulted then that is natural . Vent on social media about it or to your friends , But keep going to prove that you are BETTER than their insults and that you are The bigger person !

If necessary start a peer support group for advocates where you can vent and share encouragement to keep up fighting for The right thing .

Also watch documentaries about famous people who fought for justice . And if you cannot relate to that particular person , Then keep in mind that if you are impressed with The person you are watching about then use that person as a role model for YOUR advocacy !

Who knows ! Maybe you will be The next person a documentary will be filmed about in 50 years !

Thank you for reading


Wednesday, October 31, 2018

Donald Trump and his newest talk about born U.S Citizens

I do not have openly nervous breakdowns when I listen to Donald Trump , But I am ALWAYS paying attention to his newest plan ( If so to speak ) .

I grew up around immigrants who came to The U.S when they were already adults / in their early 50's .

My family immigrated in The mid forties so Immigration is close to my heart .

I worry a lot about Mexican's , People from Arabic countries and Turkish people , To keep it short , Everybody who he is attacking and who he has not attacked YET !

This may sound silly , But I even worry about The people who have passed on but would have been attacked by him if they were still alive !

And I thank The higher power that said people are not with us anymore because they would otherwise fear fro their lives !

Donald Trump's latest project ( For a lack of better wording ) is to revoke The U.S Citizenship for all Americans born here to immigrants .

I do not quite understand all The details and I am not sure it will make sense to explain it to me because

I am too scared to think clearly ! I know rationally and by law his new IDEA is not possible due to The Constitution and other , But one of my issues are that he obviously has NO IDEA of The implications of his IDEA !

Besides that  we all were Immigrants at some point when our ancestors immigrated to The U.S including his parents .....

People say that parents who are naturalized or permanent residents do not have to fear either .

But there is something else that they are forgetting !

We have people born in The U.S who at some point in thier lives were kidnapped or something else horrible happened to them and these people cannot identify who they are !

Some people are able to identify themselves after brain damage , Trauma or kidnapping after disappearing for more than 15 years !

But there are cases where people who went through The above mentioned circumstances and cannot tell The FBI or police who they are !

No Social Security , Finger print or anything else identifiable of their identity and worst part nobody claims these people because of loss of hope or moved away or passed on.

Some people are called JANE DOE temporarily and some people are JANE or JON DOE for a life time !

What will Donald Trump do with them ?!

I know that The FBI and other Federal Agencies will protect people , I am concerned about what laws can be enforced under Donald Trump !

As I said , I know that lots of lawyers say that his rhetoric does not do much because there are laws , But I also know that there are people in Congress and even if a small circle of people , They will agree with him .

Thank you for reading


Wednesday, September 26, 2018

Academics and getting a Master's Degree

I generally have The utmost respect for people who have a Master's because that indicates that they are knowledgeable in their field of study .

I have a few friends or acquaintances who have a Master's degree in something .

I myself plan to get a Master's in Science later in my life ( Hopefully before I turn 100 lol ) .

The academic world has changed though or maybe I should say "Worsened " .

In The past when you had a Master's , You got payed much better due to your degree AND your expertise . Nowadays unfortunately employers pay you more only because you have a Master's .

At least this is happening in Massachusetts . Although interesting enough employers seem to have double standards nowadays .

I know some people who had a Bachelors and worked at a supermarket and earned $8.00 an hour just a few years ago ! I personally know a man who in 2010 fresh out of College with a Bachelors in Physics and he worked at Stop&Shop ! There were no issues with him . He had very good interpersonal skills , Friendly , No mobility issues whatsoever and he worked at said supermarket for a while .

But I do see a lot of double standards around employers . Even if you have a Bachelors or Masters , and just trying to get a job that pays you so you can have food on The table , You will not get employed even at McDonalds because you are over qualified and it will cost The employer MORE money to hire you . Unless The employer is desperate .

Now you even need a Masters just to work as a Lab Technician !

And having a disability also is an issue nowadays even if you have a Masters .

And just generally getting a job , Employers have double standards .

Before 1999 or even 9 years  before that , In some jobs you got trained on The spot !

Nursing Aide , Clerk , Secretary and any kind of Assistant job , If you looked like you were a quick learner then you got trained while at work .

Now The only job where you get trained on The job is in housekeeping or working at CVS or equivalent .

Seriously ! There are so many double standards that is  RIDICULOUS !

In some countries in Europe , You get trained on The job fresh out of graduating High school , Even as an Administrative Assistant or Accountant /Book keeping .

We use to do that In The U.S as well till somebody decided to make education and employment more complicated .

IN Germany , Spain and any other country in Europe , During your first week , You have somebody working with you and showing what to do and after approximately The second week , If you are able to at least do half of what you watched others do then you get to sign an employment letter meaning you are hired . If you do not make it and did not indicate during your training any obstacles and you realize on your own that you are not a good fit then you are respectfully resigned from your position ( If so ton speak ) .

Cannot say anything though about Australia and other continents .

But this is something The U.S used to do and I wish we would continue .

Thank you for reading .


Friday, August 3, 2018


People are talking a lot about bullying again .

Especially on social media I see some people posting " Say no to bullying !" or " Stop The bullying !"

These are indeed good posts , But I think we should extend that subject to actually discussing bullying overall .

First of all have  group discussion that includes clarifying what bullying is .

Because bullying can and will happen anywhere !

whether in a school setting , Living environment or workplace or where you volunteer .

I personally never experienced bullying wherever I volunteer , But seriously ! Bullying can literally happen anywhere !

First off people and children / Adolescents have to learn what bullying is or what it looks like

Seconds , what causes bullying or why bullying happens .

This all maybe makes total sense , But although years go ny and people should know better , Bullying unfortunately keeps happening AND getting worse !

There are two ways to bully

1) Obvious bullying : Being violent towards others

2) Subtle bullying

Examples : In a school setting , A student kick another student , Pushing intentionally to hurt or stealing from another student or  other ways of physically harming a student .or taking something from a student and throwing somewhere .

Subtle bullying : A teacher or another student makes you feel uncomfortable or scared to speak up or not giving a student the opportunity to fix a mistake .

Subtle bullying is as common as obvious bullying but you have to pay close attention to notice !

And in subtle cases it is impossible to speak up especially for The one being bullied because you cannot prove it ! The only person who can speak up is The one paying attention .

It is simply not human nature to pay attention to each individual around you . But if you are paying attention to somebody acting nervous or out of place around somebody else then address the problem  by talking to the one who is feeling uncomfortable or speak to somebody like a Principle and simply share your observation . Or just be supportive by offering support to that individual .

You can seriously teach ANY child or adolescent this strategy !

And The same can be done in a College setting 

In a work environment  or where you volunteer , Goes The same !

Both types of bullying can exist .

Now let's go to The cause of bullying :

There are a few reasons for bullying .

We see this a lot !

In a school setting kids will bully another student simply because of jealousy.

It maybe sounds stupid but that is how life is !

Any student that is bullied by another student is being bullied because that particular student has something that another student or students want or is showing off something that other students want .
or are better at something .

In a work environment ,Although you would expect a certain level of maturity , Unfortunately not always the case . A co-worker can also subtly bully you by making you feel uncomfortable or scaring you from sharing your ideas at a meeting .

More obvious would be to make sure your phone is not working or telling the supervisor that you took their work from them and you need to prove your innocence .

Or The supervisor can also bully you because said supervisor thinks for reasons that only know  they know that you want their job .

Or treating you like you deserve less than you are capable of , That can happen in any setting as well and hard to prove .

Now The main problem is though that bullies RARELY acknowledge  bullying .

meaning you cannot stop bullying if people are not willing to acknowledge their behavior !

Even educating about bullying takes into consideration that people listening are aware of their behavior and or even care .( Just wanted to throw this out there )

Thank you for reading


Thursday, June 28, 2018


If you have a family , Be grateful if said family is able to provide emotional ,Moral and or financial support and loves you .

If you have a job , Be grateful if you enjoy your job and enjoy working with everybody involved .

If you have an apartment , Be grateful that you have a ceiling over your head , Feel safe and can pay your rent without worrying what happens next month .

If you own a house , Be grateful that you can afford a house and that you are able to financially to keep it up .

If you have a car , Be grateful that you can afford said car with every responsibility that comes with it .

If you have friends , Be grateful that that they are genuine and sincere and care about you even when you cannot buy them an expensive vase or anything equivalent .

If you buy food , Be grateful if you have The financial resources to purchase even basic meals  .

Even if you are on Government assistance , Be thankful if you can buy The food you need on Government Assistance .

If you are financially well off , Be grateful if you can buy whatever your heart desires without worrying where you will get money for even your basic needs .

If you go to McDonald's or other fast food places and you eat said food because you are allergic to most foods except fast food products ( Some people cannot eat regular chicken or other food groups due to ingredients ) , Be grateful that you can afford to go at least twice a month or more .

If you can only buy food at certain places like WholeFoods or other food stores that are actually expensive but they have The food you can eat due to allergies , Please be grateful that you can afford it because many people get sick a lot because  they cannot afford to pay for the food they desperately need and thanks to The current health care system it can be very hard to convince health insurance companies to make an exception for said food purchases .

If you have a phone , Be grateful that you can afford one .
and if you  have a phone through Government Assistance , Be grateful that The Government provides you with said phone .

If you can afford to have a TV , Be grateful that you can afford it even if you have limited TV access .

If you have internet access , PLEASE be grateful for your internet access because not everybody has access for various reasons even in The U.S .

If you have a good doctor , PLEASE be grateful because having a doctor who knows what they are talking about is rare nowadays !

Thank you for reading


Saturday, May 19, 2018

Being There For Eachother

There are  good men and bad men .Good women and bad women .

Throughout generations men have formed groups or circles for men to support eachother .

Same with women .Women have also created circles or groups to support eachother throughtout various struggles of life .

Men have been there for each other to support eachother through various life challeneges and offer feedback as needed .

Same for women .

Nowadays we still have these friendships and circles , But not as much as we used to.

Unfortunately nowadays we have more competition than friendships especially among women.

Although it is natural , It was never really about which woman has prettier hair or has better taste for dresses or purses or which woman is smarter .

Nowadays women rarely suppoort eachother through life struggles .
You are lucky if you are around women who are supportive !

Men help eachother or are SUPPOSED to help eachother .

Older / More experienced men help younger men and boys through various issues like dating , Job , academics , How to be a good man and or husabnd .

Same with women !

Older or more experienced women guide younger women and girls through daily life struggles .

wether it is fashion , dating , Academics or nowadays even career .

The more experienced women who grew to be emotionally and or mentally stronger would guide women and girls who needed help by walking The walk with them or taking their hand and doing whatever was needed step by step .

It was NEVER about strong women looking down at women and girls who do not know better !

Women say that men do not listen and that is why we have so many issues in this world !

I  agree and I disagree at The same time because as I said there are good AND bad men in this world .

I disagree though because women also stopped listening !

I am not talking though about ALL women . I am talking about some strong women who think they are better than everybody else and have The right to treat women who do not know bettter condoscendingly .

Strong women are OBLIGED to listen to women who need help and help them The best they can !

Women who need somebody to listen to them need a strong woman on their side to listen and to tell them " You are not alone ! I am here for you ! We will go through this together !"

And of course good men to listen and eventually say " What happened to you is wrong ! Tell me, How can I help you ?"

There is so much miscommuncation among women or lack thereof . It breaks my heart !

Because we have men and women who think  they are better , Prettier or smarter than others and so The so called " Smarter people should not be talking to those who need help " , Due to that particular mindset we have so many horrible situations now in this world .

Thank you for reading


Thursday, May 10, 2018

I am fearing for this generation and The upcoming generation

In The recent months bills have come out to stop gun violence especially in schools .

Also in the recent months spanking children was hot a debate and considered by The majority of people as abuse .

And never mind that teachers are not allowed to punish a student because ANY form of punishment is considered ABUSE .

Now we have had more school shootings in The U.S than I care to count !

I do not have any children , But remembering how worried my mother always was when I was in school , I can imagine to an extent what these parents went through when they either heard that their kid was injured or even KILLED during any of The shootings that occurred recently !

Now I realize that we have more BULLYING and MORE VIOLENCE due  to lack of empathy and critical thinking skills !

A friend of mine on social media posted an article about a girl who hurt a boy with scissors in school because he lifted her dress and he was taken to The nurse . He was not seriously injured so he did not have to go to The hospital .

I do not remember if this girl was asked to leave The school for a few days as punishment for her actions or not , But I was HORRIFIED by The women responding to this article !

One woman , A mother seriously was defending The girl for defending herself with scissors !

she seriously said she would not defend her son if this happened to him

and another woman was also cheering this girl for her actions and I was dumbfound !

I was wondering if they had issues with men or in this case boys and asked what if a girl did The same to me because I did have a girl lift my dress in Middle school and one of The women responded that The gender was not The issue but The ASSAULT itself !

Again I was confused and asked a woman what she would do if I stepped on her foot on purpose and she seriously said she would definitely defend herself !

And one of them seriously said and I paraphrase " He was not so bad that he needed surgery !"

And another one said that she would defend herself because of her PTSD .

I have to say , At this point I was so speechless that I messaged my friend and told her that although I respect her , But I had to unfriend her to keep my sanity !

Reading The responses of these women was so shocking I just have no words !

If I had a  kid who lifts a dress of another student or anything else that is unacceptable , I would punish my kid with NO TV , NO HANGING OUT WITH FRIENDS , LESS MONTHLY ALLOWANCES or NO MONTHLY ALLOWANCE AT ALL or something else !

If you are being raped or in serious danger of your life , THEN you use scissors to defend yourself or even a gun !

In The 90's and earlier , If a boy was grabbing The bra  of a girl in school for instance , said girl would drag that boy into her bathroom and push his head and face into a toilet bowl to teach him a lesson . Or a student would be locked in The gym to stop said student from bullying others !

Considering scissors to defend yourself  because somebody lifts up your dress or stepping on your foot on purpose is something that a MADMAN does !

Civilized people do not use sharp equipment or utensils to defend themselves because somebody was being mean and pushed them ! This defense strategy is INSANE !

And teenagers should be learning to defend themselves in a civilized manner .

May I suggest offering a karate course in ALL schools to learn self defense ?!

I am serous !

This society is turning into a world of MADNESS if self defense means carrying scissors with you in case somebody kicks or brakes your nose ( Which has been happening for centuries in The youth culture ) .

Just food for thought

Thank you for reading